SoulJah Fever!

Three weeks ago God sent me a package with big bold letters on the front that read “Open Immediately!

Shortly after, God whispered in my ear and told me that he sent an urban soul to wed my rural spirit. A soul mate! Thus I laughed when I truly realized I was interacting with my future.  And I laughed even harder when I realized that we grew up on opposite sides of the track. Baffled by such a beautiful package, I asked God the terms under which I can keep it. His response: “You can keep the package so long as you both forever acknowledge that it was ME who joined you.”  

A few days later God added the other disclaimer, “By the way, the package I sent is NOT fragile. It was bound perfectly by me, and thus will withstand any situation…so long as you keep ME in the forefront of your hearts and minds.”  I don’t shout often guys, but I can’t lie…I cried out Hallelujah!

Wikipedia defines soul mate as “a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity, similarity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, or compatibility. A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul, which is thought to be the ultimate soul mate.”  I can dig it.

Now I have something more definitive for my situation.  This wonderfully created man is my SoulJah, which I created to mean, “connected souls by the grace of Jah.” 

Now, my dear readers, I’m inspired to write Calamity Part III; which isn’t such a calamity after all. But I haven’t honed in on the exact wording for it yet, so you all will have to wait a little longer for the finale. In fact, I think I will change the series name to Blessings.


Destiny’s Revenge

Girl talk, date nights and sleepovers harmoniously rotated in the background as I paved my future’s foundation.  I danced to this melody for years and labeled it Bea’s Greatest Hits.  But the music faded as my vision for my future became more defined.  Girl talk was replaced with business convo. The more brick I laid, the heavier the business convo.  Date nights were threatened by late projects and marketing.  And sleepovers – well I probably shouldn’t have had those anyway – but they were trampled upon by rising standards.

Just a year ago, I lived a parallel life with most of my close companions.  No one prepared me for the separation I sometimes feel as I continuing building.  Instead, familiar faces fade faster than I imagined.  I don’t feel as though these friends are against me, but rather cheering me on as I reach new heights. 

Think of a racetrack: If you are someone who sees at the glass half empty, you may believe that I’m racing ahead of them.  But in actuality, I’ve changed positions. We all use to be spectators in our own dreams. Then I started moving closer to the track, and eventually I was running my race.

Now, back to my building… I am not much of a builder, and no one close to me built something similar before. So this space is sometimes uncomfortable, and I panic or make rookie mistakes.  At times, I want to tear down this building and restart anew. Just so I can play my favorite tunes over and over. But I realize that if I do, I will never be able to move from dancing in the same space. And I won’t ever truly feel accomplished.

My reassurance from God is what gets me through. He promised me a life of bountiful blessings, and  I stand on his word. It gives me strength to build a more meaningful relationship with Him in the meanwhile.  And it keeps me sane. It keeps me optimistic, and overall it makes me more appreciative to be in this place of separation. 

It is said, “as one grows deeper and more spiritual we began to look at life with a fresh set of eyes.”  This is happening to me. I see things differently, and am learning to embrace the new tunes that play. I think I’ll call them God’s Melody Synced Specifically for Bea. 

I call this Destiny’s Revenge because my destiny was revealed to me long before I started pursuing it. I always knew that God’s gift would mean changes in my life, but I never realized it would force a feeling of isolation in the midst. So during this trying time, I hold firm to God’s promise, and I see changes in my life that I never would’ve seen playing those old tunes. It’s nerve wrecking – yet rewarding, and I’m loving God’s Melody better when I think of how much I’ve accomplished just by changing the music.

I guess Destiny’s Revenge isn’t so bad after all.

Mid-Year Update

The year is flying and my time machine isn’t working!  Damn, I have to remember to get it fixed.  But while I’m here I might as well provide everyone with an update since my Jan post.

Let me start by saying I feel accomplished. I truly feel as though the hard work I put into this long time dream is paying off. And my breakthrough is happening. I’m embracing the challenges that I’m overcoming; in that way I learn new things for my future.

In case you haven’t heard, I’m thinking of adding Diaries of an Emotional Prostitute to book store shelves. The recent bankruptcy at Borders scared me for a minute, but I think it’s a good move. The set back prior to that was getting past my pride. Do you know they steal 55% from my profit? LOL  I just couldn’t fathom that I did all of this work to only receive 45% gain. But there’s very little that I can do about it in this already established market. I have come to grips with finding a work around to compensate for my efforts.

Last, if you haven’t seen my new show Uncover 2 Discover with my long time friend, Journei the poet, you must tune in. We premier on Youtube right now but that’s just because we haven’t had the dedication to set up broadcast on any other network. We will do Ustream consistently in the future, so look for that.  Speaking of our show, I’m about to jump in the editing room in a few to add final touches to next week’s show. I look forward to catching up soon. 🙂

Chapter One

I entitled this piece Chapter One because it really is the beginning of Chapter One in my professional career. Oh doesn’t it feel so good to nearly close the door of the past. Not that it was a horrible past, I actually made a pretty good name for myself there. But it just wasn’t what God put in me to do. This new career is so much more rewarding and my spirit rejoices each time I am reminded of how close I am to Chapter Two.

So how are the book sales coming? That seems to be the hot topic these days. And I must admit that they are going. I just wish that I hadn’t deleted my previous Facebook Fan Page. I’m sure that it would’ve been much easier to build a steady stream of income if I still had thousands of supporters routing for me in the background. I’ve gotten word that many believe they are already fans, or think that my new page is a dummy page created by a spammer. lol Boy I really screwed up but I’m thankful that I get to start over and connect with fresh faces. 🙂

One last thing. Beatrice McClearn’s Second Annual College Bound Outreach ends in a few days. If you know a high school student with at least a 2.5 GPA who wants to go to college, send them to my website for official rules.


Beatrice Celebrates Her Birthday

Today panned out exactly how I visioned in January. This morning I had the opportunity to meet with Donald, a man scavenging the trash of D.C.  We spoke for nearly 20 minutes in the cold, and ironically it was me without a hat. As I explained to him that he was the recipient of my monetary gift giveaway for this year, he quickly looked surprised and wished great blessing upon me. I returned those same blessings and went about my way. Donald left an impression on me; just as I’m sure I did him. I’m thankful for that and I look forward to meeting another homeless person next year.

Also the novel officially released today. Sixth Sense Publishing confirmed that nearly 10% of the inventory has shipped! Wow! Keep the momentum going because I truly believe that we can make a difference in many young people’s lives.

I’m getting ready for an interview with a member of the woman’s group K.I.S.S. so until next time…

Closing 2010 with a BANG!

Exactly one year ago, I set a goal to publish Diaries of an Emotional Prostitute. That goal was met! The release is this Friday, but the preorders have been overwhelming. Last week the first shipment of preorders mailed and I’ve gotten several responses from readers they loved the book enough to buy copies for friends!

I’m very thankful for all that has happened this year. I set goals and I stuck to them. And in between that time, I fasted from July to November to help me stay focused on my purpose. This is the beginning of my destiny and I thank you for riding it with me!


One Year Reflection

My life has changed tremendously over the past year. I wish that I would’ve written more so you would’ve followed. But since I didn’t, let’s just say that I’m more fulfilled this year than I have ever been. Not only am I more in tune with my inner spirit, but my income has increased over 20% allowing me to upgrade my lifestyle tremendously. 🙂 

Exactly one year ago my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years left me for his ex girlfriend. And the only reason I mention that is because it came as a shock to me. We went through a lot together, he held my hand as I went through my divorce. And because I allowed him in my life so deeply, it was the first relationship that didn’t end amicably. Without too much more of a free plug, I just have to say that my life has flourished tremendously without him in it and the past year has taught me that I don’t have to be angry at anything ever again. {I say that for closure because hindsight is 20/20}.

My main goal for writing today is to thank God for planting his Holy Spirit in me so that I may have the discipline to move forward and carry on with my destiny. The break up made me work harder than I ever worked while emotionally wrapped up in being in love. As I reflect, I realize I’m filled with something more divine in my spirit! Hallelujah.

Sometimes the people that you wanted in your life weren’t meant to be there in the first place. You have to believe trust in something greater, something unimaginable.